In honor of Pride Month in the US and Canada this June, I want to share with you some skills and strategies for creating greater psychological safety for LGBTQ+ employees at your workplace for yourself and others.

Although some of the specific issues might be different, these skills and strategies are relevant for creating a workplace where all employees with different identities, cultures, strengths, abilities, and personalities feel welcome, respected, and emotionally and physically safe.

“Psychological Safety” in workplace settings means feeling safe to take interpersonal risks as part of your job, to speak up, to disagree openly, and to state concerns without fear of negative repercussions or pressure to sugarcoat bad news.

Common problems experienced by LGBTQ+ employees that decrease their psychological safety

include:

• “People making assumptions about my personal life that are often inaccurate and that I sometimes feel unsafe correcting.”
• “Isolation because I am afraid of being rejected if my colleagues know who I really am.”
• “Harassment in the form of unpleasant behavior and hurtful comments.”
• “Discrimination because of assumptions about how well I can do my job leading to less opportunities for my job success.”
• “Physical threats!”
• “Constant filtering about what to tell people about myself.”
• “Intrusive questions that invade my privacy.”

This  training video from our Pridepower course shows an employee being persistent, calm, firm, and respectful in advocating with a reluctant supervisor to stop harassment from his co-workers:

Advocating for respect in the workplace – Pridepower video

To increase psychological safety at your workplace and everywhere else, everyone needs skills to:

• Protect their feelings and manage their emotional triggers so that they can stay calm, respectful, and confident no matter what other people are saying or doing.
• Take charge of a conversation powerfully and respectfully instead of just suffering through it.
• Set boundaries to address rude, thoughtless, or unsafe behavior instead of just wishing it would stop.
• Use awareness, target denial, and de-escalation strategies to avoid and stop a threatening confrontation.
• Be prepared to escape from a physical assault

For example, suppose someone has a co-worker who is always making comments about people who are gay during team meetings. Instead of just wishing this person would stop, you can think through the pros and cons of different options and then make a plan about how you are going to respond.

You could interrupt this person mid-sentence and change the subject by saying, in a respectful –  not irritated –  voice, “Excuse me! I’d like to get back to what we need to do next for our project.”

You could choose to interrupt and set a boundary, starting with what we call a connection bridge, such as: “I like working with you, AND negative comments about people’s identity (gender, appearance, culture, beliefs, etc) are against our values of creating a respectful workplace culture. I would really appreciate your avoiding making these kinds of remarks.”

When you set a boundary, you need to be prepared to persist in the face of negative reactions, such as, “It’s a free country. I can say what I want.” Or, “I was just saying my personal opinion.”

You might give a positive response such as, “I understand. You are entitled to believe whatever you want, AND I think comments like these are inappropriate in our workplace.”

If this doesn’t work or feels unsafe, you could bring this concern up with your supervisor or the human resources department.

If this happens in a social setting rather than a work meeting, you might just choose to leave.

If you are in a workplace culture that accepts this behavior, you might decide that it is not worth it to take any action and instead focus on protecting yourself emotionally – and consider seeking a different job.

Our Pridepower online teaching videos in our Safetypowers Online Learning Center show people using psychological and personal skills to address many common problems that LGBTQ+ people face in their professional and personal lives. This engaging and important resource is available free of charge at safetypowers.org/pridepower.

Pridepower is part of Safetypowers, which is the adult arm of Kidpower International. Since 1989, our nonprofit organization has served over 10 million people of all ages, abilities, and walks of life through our workshops, educational resources, and partnerships with workplaces, families, schools, organizations, and communities.

People tell us, “I use these skills every day,” and “I wish I had had these skills when I was a child.”

Our goal is that EVERYONE has the opportunity to learn how to take charge of their own safety, protect young people and vulnerable adults in their care, and teach these skills to others.

If you want to make a lasting difference in people’s lives by empowering them with safety skills, please make a donation in any amount today.  Your support will help us to provide training and resources, especially for those who face difficult life challenges such as poverty, disabilities, and prejudice. kidpower.org/donate.

You can learn more about the impact of our work by visiting kidpower.org/learn more